Why Active Voice Wins in Proposal Writing

Ashley (Kayes) Floro, CPP APMP • February 11, 2026

Active Voice: Because Evaluators Shouldn’t Have to Guess Who’s Doing What

Proposal evaluators don’t read your submission like a novel.


Evaluators review dozens—sometimes hundreds—of proposals against strict evaluation criteria, tight timelines, and scoring rubrics. They are often scanning for clarity, confidence, and proof of capability.


That’s exactly why active voice matters.


If you want your proposal to be clear, persuasive , and easy to score, then you need to use active voice. Let's break down why.



🔊1. Active Voice Is Clearer (and Faster to Process)

Active voice puts the subject—the doer of the action—front and center.


  • Passive: The system will be implemented in 90 days.
  • Active: Our team will implement the system in 90 days.


In the passive version, evaluators have to pause and mentally ask: “By whom?”

In the active version, the answer is immediate.


Clear writing reduces evaluator fatigue. And when evaluators are less fatigued, your message is more likely to land.



📢2. Active Voice Demonstrates Confidence and Accountability


Proposals are about reducing risk.


When you use active voice, you clearly state who is responsible:


  • We will deliver the training.
  • Our project manager will oversee schedule performance.
  • Our cybersecurity team will monitor threats 24/7.


This ownership signals confidence. It tells evaluators you are not hedging or hiding behind vague language. You are committing.


Passive voice, on the other hand, can unintentionally sound evasive:


  • The training will be delivered.
  • Oversight will be provided.
  • Threats will be monitored.


By whom? When? How? Active voice answers those questions without being asked.



💰3. Active Voice Keeps the Focus on the Value You Bring


A proposal is not a process manual. It’s a sales document.


Active voice keeps the spotlight on the value you bring to the customer.


Instead of: Requirements will be reviewed and documented.


Write: Our team will review all requirements and document compliance in a traceability matrix.


This subtle shift reinforces capability. It makes your organization the driver of results—not a passive participant.



🎯4. Active Voice is More Persuasive


Strong, direct verbs create momentum. They make your writing more dynamic and easier to follow. Evaluators can quickly connect actions to outcomes.


Compare:


  • Quality assurance processes will be applied to ensure compliance.
  • Our quality assurance team will apply a three-step review process to ensure 100% compliance.


The second version is specific, confident, and compelling. It gives evaluators something concrete to score.



📉5. Active Voice Reduces Ambiguity and Perceived Risk


Ambiguity increases perceived risk. Risk lowers scores.


Passive voice can blur responsibility, even unintentionally. Active voice clarifies roles, timelines, and deliverables.


When evaluators clearly see who is responsible, what will be done, and when it will be done, they are more likely to view your approach as low risk and executable.



Are There Times to Use Passive Voice?


Yes—but strategically.


Passive voice can make sense when:


  • The actor is obvious or irrelevant.
  • You want to emphasize the outcome rather than the doer.
  • You’re describing industry standards or established processes.


For example: "All data will be encrypted in transit and at rest." In this case, the emphasis is on the security measure itself, not who flips the switch.


The key is intentional use—not defaulting to passive because it feels formal.


The Bottom Line


Active voice makes your proposal:


  • Clearer
  • More confident
  • More accountable
  • More persuasive
  • Easier to score


And in competitive procurements, writing that is easier to score is often writing that scores higher.


By Ashley (Kayes) Floro, CPP APMP March 25, 2026
Tight page limitations are continuing to be a challenge as contracting officers streamline their acquisition processes. When faced with tight page restrictions, we often find ourselves struggling with trimming five pages of material into two pages of allocated space. However, sometimes the content we are working with is so long because it is simply overly wordy. In this article, I present six tricks for eliminating waste. 1. Use Active Voice With active voice, the subject of the sentence comes first and performs the action in the sentence. Active voice is more straightforward and concise than passive voice. It typically results in shorter, sharper sentences. So not only does it take up less real estate, it flows better and is easier to understand. Passive: It was decided by the Program Manager to streamline the program. Active, Strong Verb: The Program Manager streamlined the program. 2. Eliminate Redundancies Remove redundancies that take up extra space and don’t add value. I present some examples below.
icons demonstrating how to write clearly
By Ashley (Kayes) Floro, CPP APMP March 23, 2026
In the world of proposal development, there’s a persistent misconception that longer writing signals deeper thinking. Teams sometimes feel pressure to fill pages, add more qualifiers, or expand explanations in hopes that additional words will make their message more persuasive. However, the opposite is often true. Clear writing is powerful because it makes it easy for the reader to understand, evaluate, and remember your message. The goal should be clarity, not volume. The most effective writers know that concise, direct language carries more impact than dense paragraphs and complicated phrasing. In this article, we present seven practical tips to help you write more clearly and effectively. 1. Break Up Long Sentences and Paragraphs Long sentences are one of the most common causes of unclear writing. When a sentence stretches beyond 25–30 words, it is easy for readers to lose track of the main point. Instead of packing multiple ideas into a single sentence, break them into shorter, focused statements. Each sentence should communicate one main idea. Example Less clear: Our team will implement a comprehensive data management framework designed to enhance reporting capabilities while also improving accessibility for users across multiple departments. Clearer: Our team will implement a comprehensive data management framework. This approach improves reporting and makes data more accessible across departments. Shorter sentences reduce cognitive load and help readers absorb information quickly. Similarly, large blocks of text can overwhelm readers. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea or topic. If a paragraph begins to cover multiple points, consider splitting it. Shorter paragraphs make it easier for readers to scan and process information. 2. Avoid Nominalizations Nominalizations occur when verbs are turned into nouns, often ending in -tion, -ment, or -ance. While they are sometimes necessary, they can make writing more abstract and wordier. Whenever possible, convert nominalizations back into strong verbs. Example Wordy: The implementation of the solution will result in the improvement of operational efficiency. Clearer: Implementing the solution will improve operational efficiency. Strong verbs make writing more direct and easier to understand. 3. Choose Strong, Specific Verbs Weak verbs like make, do, provide, conduct, or perform typically require additional words to explain what is happening. Strong verbs communicate action more clearly and concisely. Example Weak: Our team will conduct an analysis of system performance. Stronger: Our team will analyze system performance. Replacing weak verb phrases with precise verbs makes writing sharper and more confident. 4. Remove Unnecessary Words Many phrases in proposal writing add length without adding meaning. Words like very, really, quite, and in order to clutter your sentences. Look for opportunities to tighten phrasing. Examples In order to → To Due to the fact that → Because At this point in time → Now The goal isn’t to eliminate detail, it’s to eliminate filler. 5. Use Active Voice When Possible Active voice makes it clear who is responsible for an action and typically produces shorter sentences. Passive voice can be useful in certain situations, but overuse can make writing vague and indirect. Example Passive: The report will be completed by the team next week. Active: The team will complete the report next week. Active voice improves clarity and accountability. 6. Use Lists When Appropriate When presenting multiple related items—steps, benefits, features, or requirements—lists can improve readability. Lists allow readers to quickly understand key points without digging through dense paragraphs. They also highlight structure and make complex information easier to follow. Final Thoughts When readers can quickly understand your message, they are far more likely to absorb your ideas and act on them. Remember: strong writing isn’t measured by how many words you use. It’s measured by how clearly those words communicate your message.
color team review
By Ashley (Kayes) Floro, CPP APMP March 20, 2026
Everyone wants Artificial Intelligence (AI) to be the silver bullet that finally fixes the proposal process. Faster content, fewer late nights, no more staring at a blank page. And honestly? AI does help. But there's one thing it hasn't changed—and that most proposal professionals still don't want to hear: you still need color team reviews. Here's why that's still true, even in the age of AI. Procrastination doesn't care what tools you have According to the National Institutes of Health, up to 95% of adults procrastinate, and approximately 20–25% are chronic procrastinators. About 88% of the workforce procrastinates for at least one hour a day. AI makes content generation faster, but it doesn't make humans more disciplined. Writers will still wait until the last minute. They'll still generate a first draft and call it done. Established proposal methodologies—from APMP best practices to decades of hard-won industry experience—exist precisely to fight this tendency: daily stand-ups, interim deadlines, and structured reviews that force consistent progress rather than a last-minute scramble. The first draft is never the final draft — AI or not For decades, English teachers have required students to submit multiple drafts for exactly this reason. Writing is a process of thinking. Multiple iterations help writers clarify ideas, improve organization, and refine content based on feedback. AI can accelerate the drafting stage, but it can't replace the critical eye of a reviewer who understands your win strategy, knows the customer, and can spot a weak discriminator from across the room. Stakeholder surprises at submission are still catastrophic Here's what poor planning actually looks like in practice: you're ready to hit submit, and a key stakeholder wants something changed at the last minute. A seemingly small thing to them that requires hours of rework: checking cross-references, adjusting content across multiple volumes. Or worse, they reject the entire proposal and demand a full rewrite, with a deadline early the next day. AI doesn't prevent this. Only early, structured stakeholder engagement does. Color team reviews aren't just about catching bad writing. They're about building the buy-in you need before it's too late to act on it. The problems are old. The tools are new. The process still works AI has changed how fast we can produce a draft. It hasn't changed human nature, the need for iteration, or the cost of a stakeholder blindside at the finish line. These structured methodologies were built around enduring realities—and those realities haven't gone anywhere just because the drafting got faster. I get it: color team reviews suck. But proposals without them suck more.